Intellectually, this is a no-brainer. In reality, too many of us resist doing it.
When we have a day that is technically not a work day and we cram it full of activities that drain us, people who suck the life out of us and busy-ness that leaves our soul tired and empty.
You need to take a day off.
Regularly.
WHY?
Just as music without a rhythm is just noise; life without a cadence becomes intolerable.
Taking a day off, let’s you relinquish the control you struggle so hard to hang on to.
It is a statement that life can, and will, go on without you.
Anxiety and depression levels in children are at an unbearable high. Kids younger than 10 are getting ulcers. Teenagers are getting sucked into addiction. Our young adults are being crippled by anxiety and depression. We live in the most privileged society and yet our stress levels are higher than those in countries struggling to put food on the table.
Health is contagious. We need you to be healthy so you can spread a bit of health into the world.
Your community needs you to refresh so you have the energy to respond to the needs around you in love.
You carry something within you that no one else has but you have to be rejuvenated so you carry that spark of joy into the lives of people you don’t know. So you have the calmness of peace that makes space for someone whose peace has been snatched away.
The world is a crazy place and that craziness seeps into your world. Taking a day off is a rebellious act of holding back the craziness so it doesn’t infiltrate every area of your life.
How?
It should be straight forward, but for many of us we’ve forgotten how to actually take time off unless we are on a vacation somewhere. This needs to happen regularly. Here are some tips:
Tip #1: Decide on the days.
Grab your calendar…literally. On your wall. On your phone. Make sure you have all your calendars. Then, choose 4 days in the next 4 weeks and put a circle around them. This takes some pre-planning. Think and notice what is going on. Don’t schedule it when you have something else on the calendar. Family days can be, but are not necessarily, days off. Know your life, your work requirements and your family needs.
Choose carefully. Your aim is for 24 hours off. It can be any 24 hours on any day of the week you are not working. Sundown on Friday to Sundown on Saturday. Sunday noon to Monday noon. All day one day. If you can’t make 24 hrs, start with the number of hours you can commit to.
Tip #2: Make a Plan to Say No
Say no to incessant demands. This is not a day for catching up on your to-do list. Leave the laundry, it will be there tomorrow. Emails can wait. The lawn can wait another day. The exception is, if you find the activity exceptionally therapeutic then by all means do it. But the minute it becomes a chore or a burden, re-evaluate it.
Say no to all the people who you regularly put their needs above your own. This is not a day where someone else’s agenda trumps your own…unless you make a conscious choice to share your day. This is not about being mean – it’s about being kind to yourself so you can give yourself fully the other 6 days of the week. You are balancing input and output.
You have to choose to protect this day. (You may need to go back and review some of the reasons why are doing this so you have the stamina to hold back the barrage of requests that will come from you and everyone else.)
Tip #3: Wrestle with Resistance
I’m sure it’s already happened. Your brain has already started a list as to why this won’t work. If you really want to change your life, write down that mental list of why you can’t take a day off. Here is what my (partial!) list looked like:
- Something is going to happen to derail your plan so you might as well not even start.
- My family needs me.
- I get a little panicky wondering what I’m going to do with my time.
- It feels selfish to even think about this. After all shouldn’t I be putting people first.
- I don’t have to actually schedule it; I’ll just take a day off when I can.
- I have to run a business, if I don’t get back to people I’ll lose business.
Tip #4: Rebel against the resistance.
Once those are out of your head and on paper, they don’t seem as powerful. Take the time to write down some good arguments as to why these reasons are faulty. Here are my arguments:
- Something is going to happen to derail your plan so you might as well not even start. This is all or nothing thinking. It stops you from ever trying anything new. It stops you from growing.
- My family needs me. Of course they do, but they need me healthy. If I were to die, they’d figure out how to do things and go on without me. Why do I think I’m so irreplaceable? What will they learn to do for themselves if I give them the chance. (this ended up filling up a journal page, I’ll spare you the gory details!)
- I get a little panicky wondering what I’m going to do with my time. Oh…that’s a surprising twist. We’ll figure it out. We’re going to explore enjoyment.
- It feels selfish to even think about this. After all shouldn’t I be putting people first. Making sure I’m mentally healthy IS putting people first.. it’s only 24 hrs, I’ll be back tomorrow.
- I don’t have to actually schedule it; I’ll just take a day off when I can. Yah…we both know that’s not going to happen.
- I have to run a business, if I don’t get back to people I’ll lose business. Demanding people don’t create the kind of business you want anyways. Those that allow you time to refresh are the kind of clients and people you want in your world.
Tip #5: Keep it Simple
It’s a curious thing that first the brain comes up with reasons why you can’t do it, then once you’ve worked through some of those, it then jumps on board and makes the day off a bigger deal than it needs to be. You make the decision to take a day off, your brain fights it and does a 180 and starts to dream up rejuvenating schemes so big you don’t have the energy or money to accomplish it. Keep it simple.
Tip #6: Think through contingency plans:
- Who do you need to let know that you are taking 24 hours off? Who is better off not knowing?
- Parents, especially of young kids, may not be able to take an entire 24 hours off. You can make plans to make it easier on yourself. What hours can you take off? Start small. If you can only take a couple of hours off, accept that and make the most of them. The day will come when you can expand the time.
- What will you do for meals? Think take out. Make ahead. Eat out. Think simple – crackers, cheese, sliced veg and fruit served on a napkin make up a meal with no dishes to do.
- Think creatively. When my kids were in elementary school, I never cooked Sunday suppers. They were allowed to get their own food as long as they made it look like they were never in the kitchen. It took some training. It was never perfect. I do think it taught them that they had the skills to look after themselves. I know families that have popcorn for supper on Sundays. Some have cereal. I know others that have ice cream. I know some of you are cringing but think about what you can do. What you are willing to let go of?
- How will you handle your electronics? Can you put your phone away? Can you put it on airplane mode for sections of time?
Tip #7: Explore new things. Revisit old loves.
Thinking about what you want to do ahead of time will make this day special.
- What refreshes you?
- What brings you joy? Experiment with that.
- Try a new book genre. Read for fun, not learning.
- Make a playlist of songs that are meaningful to you.
- Who pours life into your world? You might want to plan a relaxing activity with those people.
- Who sucks the life out of you? How can you set up a boundary to limit their access to you for that time?
- What is a craft or hobby that you’ve wanted to try, or return to, that you never have time?
- If you have to do necessary things, how can you adjust your mindset so you are doing them from an unhurried place?
- How can you incorporate time in nature into this day?
Tip #8: Enjoy your freedom!
Over 2000 years ago, ancient writings tell us the story of a people who were being emancipated from slavery. It is at this juncture when they were given the 10 Commandments. The commandments were rules for living now that they, for the first time in their lives, could make choices for themselves. One of those rules was to “Remember the Sabbath Day and keep it holy.” Holy simply means set apart. What a gift! Previously they were forced to work 7 days a week without a break and with no choice in the matter. Now they are being told to take one day and set it apart – make it different from the other days..
Here we are centuries later, enslaving ourselves. Taking away our own freedom and becoming a slave to cultural expectations, our electronics, and our selves.
Are you living in slavery or as a free person? Who or what has you enslaved?
Live free. Enjoy your freedom. Rejuvenate. Refresh. Re-create yourself.
Be kind to yourself! Take a day off.
Do you struggle to take time off? Join our free 30-day challenge and explore a daily two minutes of self-care to rejuvenate your life.